


A Lot

by Soar319



Category: Welcome to Night Vale
Genre: Domestic Fluff, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Mental Breakdown, spoilers for episode 73 triptych
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-13
Updated: 2020-01-13
Packaged: 2021-02-27 08:21:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,213
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22233949
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Soar319/pseuds/Soar319
Summary: "What has the Smiling God done for me?""What has the Smiling God done to me?""What will the Smiling God do to me?"
Relationships: Charles/Kevin (Welcome to Night Vale)
Comments: 8
Kudos: 61





	A Lot

**Author's Note:**

> so i might have begun to listen to wtnv like five months ago im like 7 years too late but i am now very invested especially in kevin
> 
> this is my first wtnv fic, it was fun!

"What has the Smiling God done for me?" Kevin stares at Charles, then laughs as if he asked what 2+2 was with complete seriousness; that was a question Donovan would ask, not _Charles_ of all people. "I thought you would already know, sitting through all my sermons, church meetings, and prayer circles! You couldn't have forgotten, could you?"

"No, I know, but I want to hear your own words, not to others, but you specifically. What has the Smiling God done for you?" Kevin claps his hands together with a giggle, leaning back. His long, thin sleeves flutter in the desert breeze. 

"The Smiling God fills me with its great warmth, a blinding, searing light, purity in its finest. It has come to me in my bleakest moments, lifted and kept my head above the suffocating waters, bathed me in its all-devouring presence." A soft, fond sigh, Kevin's black eyes gazing into the distance. "It has guided me, sustained me, devoured me, and made me reborn into its prophet. I have met it in the most desolate parts of this desert, where there is nothing but the lone mountain and the sun burning on dry skin. No sweat, no tears, no water, dry. The Smiling God, it has graced and filled me with its most wondrous and generous light, in both the literal and metaphorical." Kevin tilts his head towards the sun, the town of Desert Bluffs bathed in sunlight. 

"Forgive me if this might be a little rude-" 

"Oh, you can't be rude, Charles, even if you tried really hard." Kevin chuckles, giving a little kiss on the cheek. Charles returned the kiss with two. 

"Still, forgive me if this comes off a bit rude, but if the Smiling God is all this light, why do you cover yourself from it?" He gestures to Kevin's massive yellow hat; a sunhat with centipede legs dangling from the brim like tassels. It was one of the several accessories Kevin owned with the main purpose of covering his eyes - all three - from light. The third eye rests in a perpetual almost-closed state, like it was on the verge of nodding off.

"Even if I am a prophet and its messenger, I still need to protect myself from getting sunburned!" Kevin said, waving his hand. "Trust me, I've experienced what it's like to be sunburned when I first came across this wonderful little desert overworld, and it is… well, not the most fun per se." His fingers subconsciously trace over outlines of burn scarring along his arm. 

"And the sunglasses?" 

"I can't work if the sun's glare is in my vision, duh!" Kevin seemed pretty satisfied with his explanation, clapping his hands together. Charles smiles back, opting not to ask why Kevin wears said accessories indoors as well, where sunburn or glare is not a danger. "Look at the time! I need to head to the station, tell Donnie I bought him some apple juice boxes! Bottom shelf of the fridge if he wants a snack! Oh, and I bought apple juice boxes." A kiss on one cheek, other cheek, nose, and lips. "See you later, Charles!" 

"Have a good day at work, sunshine." Charles pulled Kevin's shirt down to kiss him one more time, Kevin giggling and smiling radiantly as ever. He grabs his work bag and saunters off the porch, humming away. The sunhat casts a heavy shadow over Kevin's face and body, protecting him from the sunlight.

~~~~~

There's a Kevin that he sees in passing on mirror reflections. The bathroom door is open, so Charles could see Kevin in the reflection standing in front of the closet. Kevin is wearing a stained t-shirt with DBCR printed across the front, torn and ripped up. The back has two slits, allowing a pair of crooked, stained wings to lie on the ground. His hair is up in a bun. 

He looks like he's on the verge of collapsing, yellow eyes and grey irises fighting to stay awake, third eye bleeding and open so wide, it looked like it hurt. There's a split lip, heavy bags, and bruises. Sometimes, Charles could see a dented microphone in Kevin's hand. 

He blinks, and Kevin with two hair buns is trying to decide between the open-back top or open-back dress to go with his flared pants. His centipede legs are choosing his accessories, as usual, today going for a bonnet. Charles blinks, and Kevin glances over with black eyes and smiles. 

"If you want a show, you don't have to do it from the mirror!" He laughed, bouncing over; he did try to turn Charles' face to kiss him, but Charles indicated to the toothbrush still in his mouth, Kevin settling for a cheek kiss instead. "You know you can always watch, I never mind~" He nearly chokes on the toothpaste as Kevin trails kisses down his jaw, pushing him away with a red face. Kevin laughs, light and gleeful, and goes with the top. 

From the reflection of his mug, Charles watches as Kevin with broken wings rest his head against the counter, fingers with dull nails gripping at his curls. Kevin prepares breakfast in his usual routine, using his centipede legs to make pancake batter, heat up milk, cut up fruits, and sharpen a knife all at the same time. He doesn't have the slightest clue on how said legs manage to do all those tasks, but he doesn't question it. He's a theologist, not a scientist. It also gives him a bit of a headache, watching Kevin doing so many things at once, like a machine. 

Donovan shuffles to the dining table with a yawn not much longer. Kevin plates the food and sets prickly pear pancakes down for all of them; all spines and seeds, of course, already taken out. He ruffles Donovan's hair affectionately and reminds him not to eat too fast.

~~~~~

"What has the Smiling God done to me?" Kevin blinks, tilting his head slightly. Charles lowers his book and nods, sliding a bookmark between the pages and closing it. Kevin's third eye flutters a bit open, a sliver of a white pupil inside glancing left and right. His constant smile falters for a second, covered by a little laugh. "Charles, are you sure you aren't sick? You seem to keep on forgetting!" 

"No, no, I'm asking what it has done to you. Not for you." 

"Are they not the same?" He shakes his head. Kevin makes a noise of confusion, shrugging. "Well, how about questions related to that then? What do you want to start with?" Pen set down perfectly parallel with the editorial paper, Kevin folding his hands and straightening his back and smiling. 

"I apologize in advanc-" 

"Charles, sweetheart, you don't have to apologize for anything! I don't mind talking about myself, especially to you!" 

"Alright, then… did the Smiling God give you… those?" Charles gestures towards the eight centipede legs extending out of Kevin's back, two of them pouring a pot of tea as another adds an inordinate amount of sugar. Two are organizing community news, one is recording community events for this week, one is brewing a fresh pot of coffee, and one is tucking the veil away from Kevin's view. They all pause their activities as Kevin pauses. 

"These?" Another pause before they all set down whatever they were doing, retracting and tucking neatly behind Kevin's back. One extends out for Kevin to run his fingers along. "Well, I had these for a while now! I had mechanical ones when I was with Strex," Charles tried to not think about what they would have to do to Kevin's spine to implement such limbs, "but a… friend removed them. He actually removed a whole lot of what Strex added." Kevin nonchalantly twirls his finger around the tip of the leg. One rests against the circular mark over his throat. 

In the reflection of his tea, Charles could see Kevin lifting up a broken wing, feathers shaped like swooping plumes. Stained, burning, turning to ash at his fingertips. He decides not to ask where those went. 

"And the third eye? Has it always remained in it's closed state?" Kevin opens his mouth to reply, pauses, squints to try to figure out an answer, opens his mouth again, shuts it, stares at his cup of tea, and downs it in one go. 

"... No, but I'm guessing the fact that Strex stitched it closed for several years probably did some damage to it." There are three dots above Kevin's third eye, three below; remnants of holes. It fluttered open a bit more, Kevin blinking a few times; his black eyes lightened a bit, a dark, murky yellow. He rests his fist against his lips. "I used to have it open nearly all hours of the day, let me see things that happened around Desert Bluffs in real time. One of the many reasons why I was such a good radio host! Then Strex stitched it closed because… because..." Another moment of silence. "... Why did they stitch it closed…?" The silence was getting suffocating. Charles coughed to break it. 

"Can you open it now?" Kevin shook his head. 

"It's real sensitive to light, like _reeeally_ sensitive." It's halfway open and the room's lights are turned on. Charles wonders if he should tell. "Not to mention, I've tried opening it before, but something… prevents it? Like I can't tap into that eye anymore." A shrug and smile. "Vanessa does the most excellent job at delivering me the news, though! And these." he points to his bottom eyes, "also can use said power, but in a lesser range. So everything is still a-okay!" Kevin claps, satisfied. Charles smiles and nods. 

"Thank you, I think that should be all. And again-" 

"Oh, don't go on saying sorry again. You can always ask me anything, Charles." Kevin takes Charles' hand from across the table, kissing it along the knuckles. "I don't mind in the slightest." Kiss along each fingertip, Kevin sliding off his chair and walking over to Charles, sliding comfortably into his lap. The centipede legs settle around the chair, like being caged in; Charles knows he actually isn't. "I like answering your questions. I like giving you answers." A slow and deep kiss, Kevin's long nails trailing down his jawline. He's a little dazed when they part, hands settled around Kevin's hips and rubbing circles in with his thumb. Kevin smiles, nuzzling against his cheek. "I like giving you things." 

"I know, if I asked you to bring me the sun and moon, you would." He kisses the long scar stretching from the corner of Kevin's mouth. 

"I would. I will." They stay like that for a bit, cuddling on the dining room chair; slightly uncomfortable, Charles is pretty sure one of his legs is asleep, there is no way the centipede legs should stay bent like that for long, but a lapful of Kevin is always nice, and Kevin hasn't moved yet. But also, his phone alarm goes off, jerking them back into reality. 

"I have to get ready for work, sunshine." A pout, Kevin reluctantly letting go and standing up so Charles could. "I'll see if I can visit during the weather, okay?" 

"Okay! Have fun at work, baby!" Three more kisses and Charles leaves, glancing over his shoulder to see Kevin settle back down in his seat and resume working. 

The broadcast turns on as usual, Kevin's voice chipper and happy as always. He swings by during the weather as promised with Donovan, the kid scrambling up the steps with joy holding his present in his little hands. Well, it was Charles' present, but Donovan wanted to present it, so with the addition of a little bow and flower off they went. 

Passing by the recording booth window, Charles reached for the doorknob but paused. He leaned back and glanced into the window again, Donovan standing on his tiptoes to try to look in too. 

Kevin is staring at his arm, elbow propped on the table. He's staring at the centipede tattoos, inked in white, scuttling up and down. In the faint reflection of the window inside the booth, he could see that Kevin is… not smiling, but not frowning either. Just staring, the weather echoing off the walls. His legs are unsteadily continuing to work, shuffling and organizing already-organized papers. 

Charles turns the doorknob and opens the door. Kevin doesn't acknowledge it. 

"Sunshine?" He jumps and turns around. Kevin never gets caught in surprise. The radio host could hear footsteps coming from five rooms over and usually is already facing the door before he even got to the floor. Kevin would wave with his back turned to the window, even when he tried to do a surprise visit. 

"Charles! And Donnie! Oh, what a best surprise!" A big smile and laugh, Kevin bouncing up from his seat. Donovan happily hugged Kevin, laughing as he scooped and swung him in a circle before setting him back down. "Oh, did you bring me something?" 

"Yep yep! It's from Papa!" Kevin carefully pulls the ribbon apart, gasping and clapping his hands and legs together. 

"My favorite coffee! Charles, you shouldn't have!" Charles gives a kiss on the cheek, smiling. 

"The store restocked, so I thought to get you some." Donovan wanted to see what all the different mechanisms on the table do, Kevin easily setting him in his lap and explaining each one. He takes care to make sure Donovan doesn't touch anything bloody or sharp, shows how the microphone worked, and lets him press the button to end the weather. 

Charles watches fondly as the two did a little editorial together. When Kevin puts on a prerecorded message, he swivels around in his chair and sets Donovan back down on the ground, the two high-fiving for the perfect teamwork. He sees that Kevin's eyes are still dark yellow, his third eye still half-open.

~~~~~

Kevin is working late today, so Charles drives to Grandma Josephine's house to pick up Donovan before he heads home. It has been a rather productive day in the classroom, starting a new chapter of his lesson. New plans, new material, he could hardly wait! Grandma Josephine's house came to view not long later, the demon that likes perching on the roof giving a little wave. He waves back and rings the doorbell, Josephine opening the door with a smile. 

"Good day, Charles. Here for Donnie, I presume?" 

"Thank you so much for babysitting him, it really means a lot to Kevin and I." 

"Oh don't mention it, Donnie is a sweet kid! Not a problem at all." Josephine led Charles into the living room, where one of the demons was playing pattycake with Donovan - a version that used all ten of their arms. Donovan was surprisingly proficient at keeping up. His rhythm was broken when he heard Charles, apologizing to the demon quickly before scrambling up. 

"Pa!" 

"Hey Donnie!" A big hug and kiss on the forehead. 

"I made a new drawing!"

"Oh? Let me see!" Donovan hurried over to the coffee table to pick up a sheet of paper, presenting it with eyes big and hopeful. "It's a family picture! It looks amazing, Donnie!" Charles proudly ruffled the kid's hair, Donovan beaming. 

"That's you, that's me, that's Dad, and that's Dad!" He arches a brow, looking closer at the picture. Kevin is standing next to Donovan, eight stick-legs coming out of his back done in brown crayon. Kevin is also behind Donovan, two crooked red wings coming out of his back. "Dad waves at me from mirrors! He cheers me up with funny faces and playing peekaboo!” 

“Oh, that's…. very nice!” 

“Can I put it on the fridge for Dad to see?”

“Of course!” He gifts a bag of tea to Josephine, thanks her once again for babysitting, and leaves. He lets Donovan choose what magnet and where he wants it on the fridge, holding his breath when Kevin comes home. 

Kevin showers Donovan with compliments on his newest drawing and does not acknowledge that he was drawn twice. Charles doesn't miss how Kevin's third eye opens more and dark yellow becomes a few shades lighter.

~~~~~

  
“What will the Smiling God do to me?” Kevin repeats slowly, as if he needs to taste each letter. Charles nods. Kevin's usual smile (well, it hasn't been usual these past few days) falters once more as he thinks, legs tightening and tensing behind him. He cracks a smile meant to be light and convincing and does not come close. “I may be a prophet, but I cannot see into the future! None of us can!” He laughs. And laughs. 

“Kevin.” 

“And what use is worrying about the future? As terrifying it perhaps might be and will be coming at us at what looks to be an alarming pace, it will settle into the present! There is no use worrying about it!” 

“Kevin.” 

“And whatever comes, I'm sure it will be glorious and shining bright and with only the happiest outcome, even if it starts out a little rocky! That's what always happens, everything will settle in place and-” 

“Kevin.” Charles sternly said, placing a hand on Kevin's shoulder. “Kevin, you're not telling me something.” Kevin laughs, high-pitched and too long and stretches his smile to show too much teeth. 

“I-I wouldn't hide anything from you, Charles! You know that!” His eyes are stuttering between dim yellow and orange, breaths coming out in quick bursts. 

“Kevin. I am asking you,” The stuttering stops, his entire being freezing up, “what will the Smiling God do to you?” Charles asks. Kevin stares at him, shudders, closes his eyes, and opens his third eye fully. The centipede legs surge forward. 

He's not a violent man, nor one with much physical prowess, and certainly not even on the frankly concerning level Kevin is, but it doesn't stop him from trying. Charles catches the top two legs, widening his eyes when the middle four lunge at him. Kevin grabs them before they could even reach, and with a twist of his wrist, breaks them in half with a sickening crack. They drop limply on the bed. The bottom two can't reach his face, thrashing angrily around. Kevin just shoves the blanket above them so they get tangled and can't move much. He's breathing heavily, third eye slowly blinking and widening as if stretching. 

A blinding mixture of gold and cream, a glowing white iris gazing upon Charles. Kevin slowly raises his head and opens his eyes. Two double suns, shining white irises. 

And he begins to cry. 

“K-Kevin?” By instinct, Charles lets go and cups his cheeks to wipe the tears away, recoiling as the top two legs lunge for Kevin's eyes again. Before he could react, Kevin grabs them and wrenches them into his lap. Not break, but hold down. “Kevin, I'm so sorry-”

"N-No, no I need to… I have to let it out." A breath that seemed to vibrate Kevin's entire being. “I know what will happen. I know, and… a-and I'm terrified.” He whispered, fingers tightening around the legs. Voice soft and scared and cracking at every other word. “I hear me… in years, and years, and years…” Charles wipes more tears away, and more flow down. “What the Smiling God… what Strexcorp did to my town… oh, Desert Bluffs… I…” 

He pulls Kevin into his lap, the other nearly slamming his face underneath his chin, seeking for any source of comfort. He can't move his hands because of the legs, so Charles hugs Kevin for him, cradling him close. 

“I-I'm alone, Charles. Even my own name is foreign.” An icy shiver shoots down his spine, heart skipping a beat. Kevin's eyes, golden yellow and pure white, straining to stay open, still crying, holding an immeasurable amount of grief inside. “Not even myself is with me to keep me company.” There's a horrible realization underneath, but neither wants to say it out loud. Charles just hugs Kevin tighter, pressing his lips against the side of his head. 

He isn’t sure what to do, what to say. To have his suspicions not only confirmed, but exceeded. 

“Can you suppress it? The Smiling God’s influence?” Kevin tightens his grip, exhaling. 

“I’m… I’m trying. It’s like an ocean’s tide, an ocean that quenches the cavernous thirst that the desert has.” He whispers. “To resist, it is like having your throat scratchy and dry from dehydration but choking and burning from drowning. It ebbs out like the tides, lets me be… me, and comes crashing back, pulling me under.” His voice cracks and breaks, the eloquence of radio gone. 

_The Smiling God fills me with a terrible, terrible heat, devours every part of me, until all that is left is an empty shell of my former self… a smile, and a twitch of the wrist._

"I-I'm sad, I'm sad in the future, Charles. I'm sad and scared and alone a-and-" Charles pulls back just enough to cup Kevin's cheeks again, wiping and kissing the still flowing tears away. Trying to convince some part of him that no, he won’t be alone, it is just audio, he will not be alone. 

“Tell me, what is it that you want for your future?” There’s a pregnant pause, then Kevin laughs, or chokes up between hiccups. 

"I-I can't, you already have Donnie, your students, your career, your whole open life… don't spend it all on me." Kevin cracks a terrible, sad smile, one that breaks Charles heart. His golden eyes with white that shine brighter than any sun have no joy within them. “Don’t waste your time.” He lets go. 

The two legs immediately slam his eyes shut, forcing the third eye closed. Kevin lets out an exhale, wrapping his arms around Charles and clinging for dear life. The tears stop coming, the bottom two legs stop thrashing, and the trembling ebbs down to just a shiver of the hands. Charles wants to wrench the legs away, to let Kevin open his eyes once more, to help resist the Smiling God. 

But he settles for stroking his hair and pressing kisses along the top of his head, softly whispering sweet nothings and swallowing the bitter feeling in his mouth. He knows better than to force Kevin into something, especially when he doesn’t have the slightest clue which part of himself is now in control. 

Charles holds and waits until the shuddering stops completely, Kevin’s grip loosening and lifting his head with a weak smile. 

“Do you want to go outside and sit for a bit?” It’s almost time for the sunset. Kevin slowly extracted himself off Charles, sitting up and smoothing out his outfit. Charles glances down at the broken centipede legs, feeling his stomach flip a little. “They will heal. I just like having the top two at the very least.” Kevin reassured without even looking at him. 

“Should I get some… bandages or splints or something?” 

“It would help, yes.” Charles hurriedly grabbed his first-aid from the bathroom along with a soothing cream just in case. Kevin easily fashioned a few splits and unceremoniously locked the broken sections together; when he stands, they drag behind him more or less. 

They sit down on the porch during the Exchange, the hour where the sky darkens as one sun has almost finished setting and the second almost begins to rise. It’s the only time Kevin sits outside without a hat on to soak in the sun- or lack thereof. He gazes at the sky, sleeves pooled around him. They flutter a bit in the desert breeze. Under different circumstances, Charles would be admiring how the loose fabric trails behind Kevin, swishing lightly around his arms and ankles. 

Today, he pulls the other closer, trying to ignore the fact Kevin’s eyes are black once more, iris just barely lit up. The third eye is back in its sleepy state, barely open. Kevin leans against his shoulder, still taking slow, deep breaths. 

He is supposed to be the expert on gods, on myths and creatures of ethereal, unfathomable, eldritch, and everything in between. It is true he has studied the Smiling God extensively, gone through all of Kevin’s writings and sermons, and has seen what it can do to a person, but beyond that, he doesn’t have anything else. Kevin doesn’t have anything else. 

“... I used to enjoy standing in the sun.” Kevin whispers, pulling his knees to his chest. “I would let it wash over me for an hour, letting its wondrous, warm glow light me from within. Spread my wings and soak it in, a most comforting heat swirling at my fingertips.” The third eye flutters briefly open, his eyes stuttering yellow for a second. 

The first sun dips below the mountain, the second rising and lighting the sky up. Kevin closes his eyes and puts on his sunhat, the shadows falling over his face. This one has a little yellow ribbon on top. 

Charles asks the question again. Kevin gives a smile that pulls at the left-over scar marks and shows too much teeth and doesn’t reach his eyes. 

“... A lot.” Charles cannot tell if his eyes darken or lighten. “The Smiling God has done a lot.” 

**Author's Note:**

> fuck the smiling god leave kevin alone  
> for my vision of kevin pre-strex he was the embodiment of the sun, like cecil is for the moon; he has phoenix wings, freedom of the sky and to be reborn again and again as the voice of desert bluffs 
> 
> removed by strexcorp to be grounded literally and metaphorically


End file.
